The Undertaker's List

[Intro]
(Slow acoustic guitar, E minor)
(A lone harmonica wails)
​[Verse 1]
The kid pushed back his dusty hat
In the Tombstone saloon
Said, "Old man, tell me who was fastest
'Neath that pale and bloody moon"
I've heard of Hickok and his Buntline
I've heard of Hardin's deadly spin
I wanna be a legend, sir
I just need to know, who wins?
​[Verse 2]
I polished off a whiskey glass
And I looked him in the eye
I said, "Son, that list you're chasing
Is a well-told, pretty lie.
'Cause I've buried boys who practiced
Their hand a-flashin' in the sun
They're just as dead as the man who fumbled
And never even cleared his gun."
​[Chorus]
"It ain't the speed of the hand that matters
It's the ice that's in the veins
It's the lead that's in the air
And the blood that's in the rains
It ain't about the fastest
It's about who's cold and first
'Cause the quickest man I ever knew
Was the one who died of thirst... for a fight."
​[Verse 3]
John Wesley Hardin, he was poison
He killed a man just for a snore
Wild Bill died holding aces and eights
Shot from behind, fallin' to the floor
Doc Holliday was all nerve and consumption
He was coughin' up his lungs
But he'd stand by Earp at the O.K. Corral
'Til the final bloody song was sung
​[Chorus]
"It ain't the speed of the hand that matters
It's the ice that's in the veins
It's the lead that's in the air
And the blood that's in the rains
It ain't about the fastest
It's about who's cold and first
'Cause the quickest man I ever knew
Was the one who died of thirst... for a fight."
​[Bridge]
I'm the one who builds the pine box
I'm the one who digs the hole
That "fastest draw" you're looking for
It just costs you your own soul
There's no such thing as a "Top 7"
There's just the living and the dead
​[Outro]
The kid just stared into his glass
Didn't say another word
He paid his bill, he tipped his hat
And he walked out of the saloon
He didn't touch the iron on his hip
(Slow acoustic guitar fades)
​